Hooters Opens Up in the Neighborhood of Make-Believe

Mr. Rogers: Alright kids, lets do some make-believe. Today, a Hooters Restaurant has opened up in the neighborhood creating quite a controversy.

(Trolley comes around)

(King Friday steps out)

King Friday: Today is a great day for the neighborhood. The Hooters Restaurant has opened it's doors. It will be great for our economy.

Lady Elaine: I think it's a bunch of filth and it will bring immorality to the neighborhood of make-believe.

King Friday: Well, Lady Elaine. No one cares what your ugly dried up ass thinks.

(Meanwhile, over at the Hooters)

Henrietta Pussycat: Meow, meow degrading. Meow, meow need job or home will go into foreclosure.

X-the-Owl: Come on now, can't I see some more fur? Where are my wings at?

(Trolley drives by with a plate full of wings and a beer)

Prince Tuesday: Isn't that cannibalism, X?

X-the-Owl: Not my species of bird, so no.

X-the-Owl: Tuesday, what are you doing underneath your cape.

Prince Tuesday: I can't help it. Lady Aberlin looks so hot in that outfit.

X-the-Owl: Oh, I thought you were looking at Purple Panda.

Prince Tuesday: Eww, gross!

Mr. McFeely: Hey, Lady Aberlin come over to my table.

Lady Aberlin: Mr. McFeely, do you want some wings?

Mr. McFeely: Actually, I'd like to make a speedy delivery with you in the back. That's why they call me "McFeely".

Lady Aberlin: Only if you tip well.

Prince Tuesday: Lucky bastard.

X-the-Owl: I know, let's slash the tires on his mail truck.

(Meanwhile, Lady Elaine is outside picketing and protesting the Hooters Restaurant)

Lady Elaine: This place must close.

X-the-Owl: That bitch never lets us have any fun.

Prince Tuesday: I know. Let's slash her tires too.

(Trolley comes back to Mr. Rogers' place)

Mr. Rogers: (Grabs a wing) Damn, they're cold. So anyways, we'll catch up with them next time as King Friday puts out a hit on Lady Elaine for disrupting his Hooters' franchise.

(There's a knock at the door)

Mr. Rogers: I bet it's Mr. McFeely.

Mr. McFeely: Hey Fred, look who I brought over.

Mr. Rogers: Wow, it's five Hooters' girls! Alright kids, see you later. Watch this picture/picture movie on how to make dry ice bombs, remember that your special and all that good shit.

Lifetime Movie Generator

You say writing a movie script is hard? Not if you work for the Lifetime Channel. It's simple. Take 4 of these 64 topics/cliches at random and there you go. You now have a Lifetime movie script. Go ahead and sell it!

1. abused woman
2. drunken husband
3. molested child
4. woman addicted to drugs
5. stalker ex-boyfriend
6. long drawn out court case
7. washed up TV mom from 70's or 80's
8. woman confused about her sexuality
9. gay son
10. suicidal woman
11. suicidal child
12. woman with cancer
13. child with cancer
14. woman with freaky rare disease
15. child with freaky illness
16. skeptical doctor
17. broken family
18. neglected child
19. Christmas miracle
20. gay daughter
21. kid on drugs
22. pedophile
23. murder
24. runaway kids
25. abusive husband/boyfriend
26. drug-addict husband/boyfriend
27. woman in prison
28. woman wrongfully accused
29. psychotic neighbor
30. oldest sibling raising orphaned brothers and sisters
31. family facing house foreclosure
32. feuding divorced parents
33. trouble-making kids
34. rapist
35. involvement in religious cults
36. estranged older mother
37. long lost parents
38. woman finds out she married a psychopath
39. drunk driving
40. kid dies from accident, mother becomes activist
41. woman goes insane
42. caring, loyal best friend
43. woman with anorexia
44. woman with bullemia
45. woman dying
46. woman with retarded child
47. husband/boyfriend with gambling problem
48. woman kills boyfriend
49. road trip evading police
50. unfair legal system
51. kidnapped or missing child
52. kid on drugs
53. kid bullied in school
54. house burns down
55. rags to riches story
56. teenage pregnancy
57. woman has abortion
58. adopted kids
59. cheesy Christmas family get-together
60. woman speeding away nervously in an ugly old car
61. poor single mom struggling to raise kids
62. woman thought her husband was dead, finds out he's alive
63. woman with hidden past
64. woman remarries, ex-boyfriend/husband comes and finds them